S'mores and Scary Kitchen Stuff

I had a bit of a kitchen catastrophe today, one based on a combination of excitement, determination, and just a smidge of stupidity. Ok, maybe more than a smidge.

Earlier today I was having some serious cookie cravings. And not for any ordinary cookie, either. I really wanted to make those chewy cocoa cookies, the ones that taste more like brownies than cookies. What I didn't know was how to go about making them. So I did my research and stumbled across a few versions of this shiny, crackled, flourless cocoa cookie, one that looked so amazingly good and easy. The only problem was  the recipe called for a few egg whites, and since I had  no intention of leaving yolks sitting around in my fridge for a week, I decided to use those somehow too.

And what better dessert to use them for than key lime pie? Omg, I cannot explain the goodness that is key lime pie, especially the Edwards brand they sell in single slices at the supermarket. (I went through a phase where I bought two of those every week, along with Stouffer's mac & cheese, my other guilty pleasure.) I've been meaning to make one this week anyway, so I figured today was as good a day as any, right?

WRONG. VERY WRONG. Note to self: Do not attempt to operate heavy machinery when your in a state of dessert delirium, with chocolate and pie and cinnamon rolls dancing around in your head. You will hurt yourself, very, very badly.

Ok, so I wasn't operating a forklift or anything. I was opening a can of sweetened condensed milk, the ones with the pull tab that are supposed to make your life easier. What happened next was out of a horror movie. For me, at least. Apparently, I pulled the pull tab too hard because it got stuck and somehow ended up slicing open my right index finger knuckle nearly to the bone. I screamed bloody murder and threw the can of milk in the sink, then wrapped a kitchen towel around my finger to stop the blood bath. I'm not gonna lie,  I got a bit woozy for a moment because I thought I needed stitches, it was bleeding so badly, and I almost cried. This was in a span of 30 seconds. It was awful, terrifying, and above all, simply stupid. If I was paying more attention, I would have noticed that the lid was really stuck, and then would have used a can opener, no problem. But I didn't do that, I instead wound up injuring myself all for the sake of a stupid key lime pie which, guess what? Turned out tasting like crap thanks to the fact that there wasn't nearly enough lime juice in it, and I ended up mixing the whole concoction in a glass bowl that had cheese stuck to it thanks to our lovely dishwasher. I guess my blood loss caused me not to notice that.

As for my flourless cocoa cookies??? Let's just say I'd rather not talk about it...

So for now, I will leave you with this bit of advice...Pay attention in the kitchen, always. Use a can opener when necessary. And when all else fails, make s'mores. Just wait until the fiance gets home to roast the marshmallows.

S'mores:

• 4 graham cracker squares
• 1 Hershey bar, broken in two squares
• 2 marshmallows

Place a chocolate square on the graham cracker square. Roast the marshmallow over a flame. Once it is charred to your liking, blow out the flame. Place the marshmallow on top of the chocolate, then cover it with the other graham cracker and smush down. Repeat process. Enjoy!